Right, I need to talk about something that comes up in almost every single booking conversation I have.

“Should we bring the older one?”

And my answer is always, always, always yes.

YES

Bring them. I don’t care if they’re going through a phase. I don’t care if they’re two and feral. I don’t care if you think they’re going to be a nightmare. Bring. Them.

Here’s why.

It will NEVER be as bad as you think – infact, 99.99% of the time, it is blooming wonderful

I promise you, in years of doing this, I have never once had a sibling completely derail a session. Have I had toddlers who arrived with their arms crossed, deeply unimpressed with the whole situation? Absolutely. Have I had a three year old announce loudly that they wanted to go home ten minutes after arriving? Yes. Have I had a little one decide that they were also a baby and would like to be wrapped up in a blanket on the beanbag? More times than I can count.

And every single time, and I REALLY mean every single time, something happens in between all of that after some patience, snacks and books (yes, I will always sit cross legged on the floor reading stories to them in funny voices to get them on side, followed up with some dancing and magical fairy flying lessons).

A tiny hand reaching out to touch an even tinier hand. A big sister leaning in to whisper something to a baby who has absolutely no idea what’s going on but looks up at her anyway. A brother who spent the first twenty minutes hiding behind mum’s legs suddenly deciding that actually, this baby is quite interesting, and lying down next to them with the most enormous smile on his face.

Those are the photos that end up on walls.

Because a new relationship is being born too

When your baby arrives, something else arrives at the same time.

A brand new soon-to-be bongd.. The one between your children that will be one of the most significant of their entire lives. The person who will know them longer than almost anyone else. The one who will remember things about their childhood that even you won’t remember.

And right now, in those first precious days, that relationship is brand new. Your older child is meeting their person for the very first time. They don’t know that yet. They might be a bit wobbly about it. They might be hovering somewhere between excited and deeply suspicious.

But that moment, that exact, first-days-of-knowing-each-other moment, is one of the most extraordinary things I ever get to photograph. And I genuinely cannot imagine not capturing it for you.

What actually tends to happen

In my experience, siblings in sessions go one of two ways.. and both are brilliant.

You get the gentle ones. The ones who tiptoe over and stroke the baby’s head with one careful finger. Who look up at you with these enormous eyes that just say – I think I love this. Those photos will make you cry every time you look at them.

And then you get the chaotic ones. The ones who want to be in every single shot. Who pull faces at the baby. Who make everyone in the room laugh including you, including me, and.. more often than you’d think.. including the baby. Those photos will make you laugh every time you look at them.

Both are perfect. Both are real. Both tell the story of your family exactly as it actually is right now.

How I actually do it

I always save sibling time until we’ve got the newborn solo shots done first – baby is already settled and sleepy, and we’re not trying to wrangle a toddler and settle a newborn at the same time. That’s a lot for everyone.

I keep it completely relaxed. If your older one wants to be front and centre – brilliant, let’s go. If they’d rather sit next to you and watch from a safe distance – also brilliant, totally fine.

I never force anything, because the images that come from forced are never the ones anyone loves.

I also genuinely love toddlers. The chaos, the honesty, the completely unfiltered commentary on everything. They make my sessions more fun and my images more real and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

It doesn’t matter how big the age gap is

Eighteen months between them? Wonderful. Eight years? Also wonderful.

I’ve photographed a twelve year old holding their newborn sibling, looking down at them with this quiet, slightly stunned wonder on their face. That twelve year old is going to be an adult one day. And that image will still be on someone’s wall.

Don’t leave anyone out. Whatever age they are.

So please.. just bring them

Whatever phase they’re going through. However convinced you are that it’s going to be a disaster. However many times they’ve said they don’t want a baby brother or sister this week.

Bring them. Let me do what I do. Let the real moments happen.

Because in twenty years, when your children are grown and the baby is taller than you and calling you by your first name to be annoying – you will look back at those images of them meeting each other for the very first time.

And you will be so, so glad you have them.

→ Book your newborn session here — siblings always welcome 🤍